‘Explanation’ threads are a-plenty in the Twitterverse these days. It’s like doing a mini TED Talk into the void and applause is in the form of likes and retweets. But a handful of these threads take off and one of the recent ones that went viral is by Twitter user succdevon.
She composed a long thread explaining what our milk tea orders say about our personalities and it’s accurate AF. The user claims to work at a boba milk tea place and has done enough research to warrant a comprehensive thread.
Take this with a grain of salt and just get a kick out of it—here is what your milk tea order says about your personality:
Original milk tea is for the Asian Baby Girl/Gangster who owns at least one Supreme item
1) Original Milk Tea
chances are you’re an abg. or one of those asian guys that has a supreme shoulder bag. either way you’re gonna end up going to uc irvine pic.twitter.com/yE0W7hcG4H
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 29, 2018
Taro milk tea is for those too scared to taste the other flavors of life
2) Taro Milk Tea
you’re probably pretty new to this whole boba thing. that or you’re too scared to try anything else. stop doubting yourself! trust your instincts! step out of your comfort zone! pic.twitter.com/VxTXL37XmI
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 29, 2018
Thai milk tea is for the non-fussy people who just want something cheap from the menu
3) Thai Milk Tea
you’re probably a soccer mom. or you’re an asian person that enjoys the simple things. either way you gotta get somethin quick and cheap for your boba fix and god knows you only got so much money to spare pic.twitter.com/RJtE1Xbu7f
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 29, 2018
Matcha milk tea is for the health nut wannabes who aren’t really that willing for drastic lifestyle changes
8) Matcha Milk Tea
you wanna be healthy, but do you really wanna be healthy? you do all the right steps. read your horoscope. meditate to harness your chakras. your stressed but not enough to drastically change your lifestyle. this will do. pic.twitter.com/43q3WeZs8v
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 29, 2018
Coffee milk tea is for the no-nonsense tough cookies who want to go straight down to business
15) Coffee Milk Tea
you did not come to fuck around. you mean business. probably going to be someone’s boss someday. right now you are STRESSED but you keep it behind a stern exterior. people are scared of you. deep down you’re a softie but right now you got shit to do pic.twitter.com/UDomUaRpEh
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 30, 2018
Oolong milk tea is for the art-inclined, visually impaired, cute Asian
17) Oolong Milk Tea
oh you ASIAN asian. probably the artsy type. cute and quirky. you probably have terrible vision and don’t take care of yourself as well as you should. pic.twitter.com/SQ4WsPBQHx
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 30, 2018
Wintermelon Milk Tea is for people who have their guards up all the time and are probably allergic to change
18) Wintermelon Milk Tea (by popular demand)
we don’t have this at my job but from those who’ve asked me before, you’re probably defensive. but for good reason. you’re afraid of change. you have a hard time trusting people. don’t be afraid to open up! pic.twitter.com/AMB0c5oDKL
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 30, 2018
Almond milk tea is for the sweet, soft boys and girls
19) Almond Milk Tea
the sweetest people ever. you bring joy to a lot of people. no one deserves you!! anyone who’s ever broken your heart was literally a loser and you can do better pic.twitter.com/GwfmDOMZJi
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 30, 2018
Lavender milk tea is for those who are helplessly stuck in some sort of limbo. Also, apparently they are nasty
5) Lavendar Milk Tea
this nasty. y’all really out here drinking sum that smell like your Lola’s living room. you’re at a limbo stage in your life rn and you need help fast pic.twitter.com/XFQb6vBkfD
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 29, 2018
Earl Grey milk tea is for the stylish introverts
20) Earl Grey Milk Tea
I’ve had this only once and I want it again. y’all are also most likely asian and people with excellent fashion sense. tend to be introverted, but you’re a solid friend for the people you’re close to pic.twitter.com/vu4ByUMtcW
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 30, 2018
Hazelnut milk tea is for those who grind non-stop for their bread
6) Hazelnut Milk Tea
you’re a working class person. you’re about that bread. you’re pretty mentally mature. stay on your grind but don’t overwork yourself, you’re still soft on the inside pic.twitter.com/06ArAOthSJ
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 29, 2018
Hokkaido milk tea is for the kind of friends who would die for you
21) Hokkaido Milk Tea
mom friend. would take a bullet for you. if stan twitter were a drink, it would be this (don’t worry I’m dragging myself on this one) pic.twitter.com/ggBgQ9iMw6
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 30, 2018
Any fruit flavored tea is for those who love giving joy to other people
22) Any Fruit/ Flavored Teas
you like to live a little bit. making people happy makes you happy. you’re impulsive and a little bit moody but hey, no one’s perfect pic.twitter.com/JPSKozDC4C
— dev ☁️ (@succdevon) October 30, 2018
